incomplete.

So i lied. I couldn't hold back not posting on my blog. I express all my feelings and thoughts onto this blog, that it has now become a part of me, it feels like a leg or an arm. The past few weeks have been mediocre i would say, from the emo nights to the happy days. The last time i could recall being happy was when i went shopping, I think i've mentioned this before, but shopping does wonders, you feel like you're on top of everything even if it was the shittiest day for you after a good shopping spree. Now that being said, i have a lot of incomplete thoughts, and pieces of puzzles that don't go together. I've come to conclusion that, it's really hard to find a true friend that will stick it out for you. Yanno those friends, that you talk to for a while and than they just disappear all of a sudden because they got too carried away with whatever they were doing and they forget all about you. After awhile, i still haven't found that "person" that i could click with (no homo), it guess its like a long term investment, you may treat each to mcdonalds, and buy each other gifts on their birthday, spend time talking to each other about life and the ish that's been going on. For guys, it might be a little different than girls, for guys we might have to find it in a form of a girlfriend. I could be completely bias here, but this is my opinion. It's sometimes hard to tell your "bros" about your life, and open up to them, yeah we may drink up and chill with em, but the thing is, it's harder for guys to open up to another guy and tell them your life story, it's homo with a bit of awkward turtle. It's getting late and i'm getting tired, but i feel like it's going to be another restless night. Sometimes over analyzing isn't so bad after all, you see the wider spectrum of things that some people may not see. Please let this weekend be good, i'm soo looking forward to it already. "If you have no expectations, than there won't be any disappointment." Word up.

In time again, i always end up in disappointment, thinking that you'll be there for me when i needed it most, remembering that you said you were "down" and the worse thing is giving myself false hope, knowing that things maybe never happen. As one would say "Expecting the worse, hoping for the best." I'm the last one you should be fooling because i'm not "down" for that kinda bullshit. I'll just have to keep doing my own ish and let things flow. I wish i could go back into time, where girls had cooties and where boys would only play with lego and not associate themselves with the girls whom played with barbies.

Head high, chest out, neck to the collar, look proud. Left, right, left right, left.

bloggering

Okay guys, i've realized that a lot of my entries are all text, and have no pictures, which makes it boring to read. MORE PICTURES TO COME...


Be right back, busy month.


Hiatus..probably

PMS much

I don't understand why girls give us the excuse that they have their PMS when they're cold shouldering us. It doesn't explain why they're doing it to us, and yet they always give us that excuse and they think they can get away with it in any situation. I have yet to still find out the answer to that but for now, let girls be who they are when they're on their pms and let them know they're being fucking fat bitches. Perhaps don't talk to them for a while, don't call them, let them know they're bitches but yet keep it on the downlow so that they don't go off on you about how much it sucks to have pms and that they're girls. But like they all say "if you can't see me at my worse, than you don't deserve me at my best." Real talk nigguhs.

I'm done my time here and i really need to figure out what i really need, because it's obvious that it's not working out right now. I'm not disappointed or mad, i'm content with whatever i did so far but sometimes not everything works out. Bitches need to know what they want. However, if you ever need someone to talk to, i'll be the one lending you the shoulder, and it won't be cold. =)

p.s. I didn't mean to use "bitch" in that context, don't get me wrong girls.

Crazy.

I believe we all have to die someday. But that day will not be determined by us. God will determine when we leave the earth, and hopefully to rest in peace. I've realized that i care too much about one thing and it leads onto the next, which isn't all too good to be honest. It's good to care about someone or even something, but sometimes when it becomes excessive, it becomes a problem. Hopefully things work out for the rest of ya'll even if it doesn't workout for me, but until than i don't have anything negative to say because it's s'all good temporarily. If you don't have expectations than you won't have disappointment. Still learning.

The weekend is about to end and i had some good rest ups, so i'm pretty happy about that but it's almost time to get back into shape and working on some assignments. Let's talk about prioritizing more often.



This shit does wonders, thanks pegasus for the tea.


Good day.

Never let you go.

Sometimes, i wish life was made simple. Nothing to worry about, nothing to care about, and nothing to dream about. I wish life was easier. I hate this. And there goes another one that will most likely end up in disappointment, i don't know why i even bother anymore, it feels like every time i'm almost there, the rollercoaster ride begins. I can't tell if this is something i need or want. What the hell is going on? Someone please tell god to help me. Maybe if i didn't have expectations, i wouldn't end up in disappointment, or maybe i just worry too much about the situation. And here i am again, with that asshole front, trying make something work out but it seems like everytime that i try the situation gets worse and whenever i try to confront, one tries to escape the reality. When will ever gain enough confidence to do the "big boi" stuff? Every time i listen to that song, he tells me to remain persistent, man i'm at the point where i feel like giving up and i don't even know why but it sucks to know that i want to. What's holding me back...? This training is moving fast, regardless if you like it or not. I don't like going at your speed anymore.


Life.

on the verge

Fuck it, i'm on the verge to dropping this shit, it's not working. Disappointed.

Sometimes you have to take a step back in order to move foward.

I learned it the hard way, when will i ever learn it the easy way?


This is stupid, i need someone to talk to.

Say goodbye

For all of you, i know saying goodbye is the hardest thing to do, regardless of the situation. However, saying Hi, Hey, Whats up was the easiest thing to do though. Why is it that hard to say a simple goodbye? It's another thing i won't ever understand in life, call me dumb or stupid, i don't care. Today was the last day to clean up my house in richmond, or i should say, "the house" in richmond, we gave all the keys and remote for the garage door to the new owners. Just by the look in their face, they were soo happy with their "new house." Eh, who wouldn't be happy with a house like that, it was perfect in every way, minus the backyard swimming pool. Although i've only lived there for about 2.5 years, all the great memories kinda made me sad, to say my last good bye. I could remember all the good and bad times, from the house parties to the phone smashing arguments with my parents. Whatever, everyone has to move on at some point in their lives.
And this is the story of my life. I hate moving, it sucks.