I never knew it could turn out this way

I never knew i could feel so low in life before, almost degraded if you will. I knew it would be a good day, i thought that someone could make my day again, but it turns out that a beautiful day like this could turn out to be so frustrating. I don't mean to whine and bitch about the things i hate in life, but when things go down like this, it upsets me, especially when you're feelin' a bit disrespected in a way. I'm usually a happy guy, but when little things like this just pisses me off, i feel really disrespected. I sometimes wonder how a person thinks, their words should obviously match their actions, but i feel that none of that is going the right way. I try to hide my emotions as much as i can, because i believe that one person's action could affect everyone else. The point is, let yourself be, and when you feel that others aren't appreciating you and your presence then fuck them, they're not worth your time and effort. Or lets put it this way, i've been having a really bad day, i hate my fucking manager.

For those who think i complain too much, i suggest you put this blog on a website block. A blog is a way of expression your own opinions and feelings, so if you don't like it simply don't come back reading my shit again.

Last but not least, thanks for those who enjoy reading my shit.

haters, fuck you

edit -- Which ever one of you fuckers that decided to click "bored" for their reaction, go fuck yourself.

You're a dime plus 99.

I've realized quite a bit lately, but most importantly i've realized that people aren't always going to be there for you. People made their promises, and these promises are never to be seen again probably in the next few months or even years. I hate to say this but, it sucks fucking monkey balls. Just when you need a friend to talk to you, it seems like nothing is going the way you want it to be. I wish that i didn't have to grow, grow apart from people that mattered to me the most.
I miss this that feelin' already, the feelin' of being that friend or whatever you wanted to name it. That person that you could always relate to, it almost seems non-existent nowadays.

I really wanna see how things will turn out in the next few months. Please let it be good.

Imcomplete thoughts again...

So today was really boring, i woke up at 7ish, got to school late for about 15minutes. Sleep through the whole class, and when i got off class at 1030, i went home to sleep again and didn't wake up until 330, and my manager asked me if i could start at 3 instead of 6. So i kinda fucked up and came to work 1.5hr late. But damn that uber nap was nuts!, i never knew that a nap could be that good, felt so energetic for work. Anyhow, life's been pretty good lately, and i'm starting to get my groove on again. Everything seems better when you look at it on the bright side. We only got one life to live, so make it good, and don't fuck up. Let's not get mad over silly things, because it s a major buzzkill and it ruins the mood. =)

So we're just about half way through April, and it already seems like summer is around the corner, i have a few more days of school and than finals which is gonna pretty slack as usual. Been drinking every week for the last 3 weeks. S'all good, just keep going with the flow and everything will be okay. Like she said, "Don't worry."



About time i get a picture wid you Kathleenie =D

What up, Summer2010?
More pictures to come.

Pissing

I've realized that you don't yell at someone that you genuinely like, when you don't mean it. It's pissing at times and you let your emotions out, especially when you're running on alcohol. Maybe this is closure, i'm really unsure of what's going to happen in the next few days, weeks, months and even years. Then again, i made a mistake by letting out my anger on the wrong people, such a stupid thing to do especially when you're all there to have a good night. I know my night was ruined when i finally realized that i did something that wasn't necessary. Very disappointed in myself, i only want to be appreciated, but i feel that i only get the opposite of that, but whatever. Probably one of the worse moves i've made in my life. I'm sorry. I didn't mean a thing i said.

It's those little things that get to you sometimes. The phone calls that she said she would make at the end of the night, but in the end she didn't make an effort to even to say a good night. The promises that we had, you probably forgot already. It's so hurting thinking back to those things. I hate drinking sometimes, i get wayyy too emotional thinking about that shit. Reminiscing on those things that you used to say through text messaging, hurts a little more, on top of all the things that happened.


I epic failed.





Wow... found this on tumblrrrrrrr

It's a beautiful thing

So I'm pretty stoked for Earl's Party tomorrow and i can't friggin wait for shit to go down.
I'm just about to go to bed, but i felt like blogging about something that kinda struck my mind for a bit and made me think about my problems all over again. My thoughts are recycled. I thought to myself, why does everything happen for a reason? It happens naturally and there's no way we can change things, no matter how hard we try. Problems are challenges that we all face in reality, and it keeps coming at you. Keep in mind, it's a beautiful thing. Life would be so boring without it. Enjoy the ride ya'll, it's worth it, and worry less.

I have another thing i would like to point out. Girls that are constantly being wayyy to hard on themselves, in terms of looks. Beauty shouldn't be compared with one another. "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder." I'm sure most of you have seen or heard of this quote somewhere before. It doesn't matter how good you think you look sometimes because your self esteem fluctuates if you keep comparing yourself to others. Babe, there's always going to be a chick that has nicer hair that you. A nicer ass than you. Skinnier than you. A better personality than you. Realize that you can't always please others? Spend your time wisely with the one that appreciates you most. You're not going to win this battle, if you're not comfortable in your own skin. In my opinion, start loving yourself first, and then maybe continue on with the rest. Go see dr. Phil, if you think you can make everybody like you, but please accept the fact that there are haters out there in the world. I love you girls, but most importantly start loving yourself first.

"It's a beautiful thing."

So today i donated some blood, was pretty fun actually, and it was pretty quick too. So as we were getting called up, there was a lady and her name was "MARY JANE" LOLLOLOL... Hella funny.

Anticipating this weekend.
I remember someone telling that, "If you can pick her up, you can drop her down." So true, so true. Let things be, if it doesn't come, than just let yourself free. But remember, take risks. If you don't take these kind of risks in life, than its a life that's not worth livin'.

Same shit. Just another day.

Keep livin' a dream, but refuse to live a lie. I want to get my life back on track. How could this life that was made so simple become so hard to live in? I'm not going to lie, i've been feeling like crying the past few days, but i couldn't. I don't know why i can't because i feel really heartless lately, no emotions, no feelings....
"Pain is inevitable, suffering is a choice." I chose to suffer. I hate staying at home, i hate coming home even if it was really late. Ever since i moved away from my family, and started living with my grandparents again, it wasn't the same. I get too deep in my thoughts when i sit at home, with nothing to do. I miss the way things used to be back at 'home'. I miss 'home.' I miss my 'sisters.' I miss my 'dog.' I miss my 'parents.'




If he loves you girl he'll be there